Old Lady Hair

This is the age in which it is no longer appropriate to have hair longer than you did in high school.  Wait, is this the age in which it is no longer appropriate to have hair longer than you did in high school?  What about college?  What about the fact that I cut my hair short while I was in college, does that buy me an extra year?  If I'm not a mom, am I exempt from mom hair?  What exactly does that mean?  This "lob" fashion magazines speak of is that or is that not mom hair?  On the new show Nashville, both the young and the old country star have similar hair (here's to hoping that this will be the catalyst for big hair to be the next lob) what does that mean?  Is long wavy hair appropriate for all ages?  This is very important information that I need to sort out immediately before someone assumes I'm 20 or 40.  This could be disastrous!