Mrs. Jane Lamontagne

Isn't it just a bit too easy to fall in love with musicians?  I think maybe I listened to too much music as a kid.  Was my first true love Cat Stevens? Probably not, but I certainly fell in love with Tea for the Tillerman, and luckily there's a photo of him on the back to deter my 8 yer old self.  More than a decade later, I haven't changed much.  I went to the Ray Lamontagne concert on Saturday night, and I couldn't help but think about how dreamy his voice was. 

Now let's all freak out a little about how Cat Stevens and Ray Lamontagne look a lot alike.  Is hairiness some kind of folky music street cred?

Cat Stevens

Ray Lamontagne

WHO WOULD WANT TO DATE A MUSICIAN? That is just a recipe to have your man cheat on you.  But really it is also an irresistible recipe for love song lullabies.  Try to resist that!

Guest Post: Jessy on Chasing her Dreams

My good friend Jessy noted that I hadn't posted in quite sometime.  "I know. I know," I remarked, "I feel uninspired."  I spend most of my time surrounded by 20-somethings, and yet none of them seem to be having crises.  Maybe the summer heat makes our insecurities shine brighter than when they're bundled up in the winter.  Needless to say, Jessy took her QLC and decided to work on an album.  Here's her story of how she decided to do it:

"When you work with kids in the field of education, you strive to be the kind of inspiring mentor you were lucky enough to cross paths with growing up -- the kind of teacher who can flawlessly mix academic lessons with life lessons in cool, original ways.

After I graduated from college, I decided to take on an AmeriCorps year of service at a nonprofit. I worked within a team of five to design and deliver a fun and educational literacy-based after school program to around 30 kids at a Boston-area middle school.

The school year crept by for me with its extreme highs and lows, challenging and rewarding in ways I never anticipated. Suddenly it was spring and the end of the school year was upon us! My supervisors encouraged us to think about the lasting impressions we all wished to make, which got me asking some big questions. What were the important values or wise words I hoped the kids would take away from our time together, and had I been demonstrating them with my own words and actions throughout the year?

I wondered, what have I learned in my lifetime that I value most and carry with me daily? What do I know now that could've been really helpful to Middle School Me? After giving it some thought, I arrived at a semblance of a theme -- something about believing in how staying true to yourself, as difficult as that can be, will lead you to discovering your passions, and that pursuing those passions with a full heart and mind is the key to finding happiness and success. Or something like that.

Throughout my year as an AmeriStar, I was also playing in a friend's band. Though music had always been a huge part of my life, it took me until college to find the courage and motivation to pick up guitar and begin singing and performing. I ended up in the band by happy accident and was soon playing shows to audiences of friends and sometimes strangers too. I loved all of it -- the rush of performing for a pumped crowd, the booming kick drum guiding the way, the pretty bell-like tone of my recently acquired used yet perfect electric guitar I called Batman... I realized I loved making music more than anything else. I also realized I wanted to give writing and performing my own original songs a shot. However, it turned out that my exhausting 9-5, working-with-kids lifestyle wasn't super conducive to the creative process of writing and recording an album in my limited free time.

So, back to the question of whether or not I was exemplifying this lofty theme of pursuing your passions with my own words and actions.

While I was finding at least a little time to make music, I was only doing it halfway. Or rather, I had yet to give making music a full and honest effort and this frustrated me. That's not to say that I didn't love working with every one of those kids through the good times and bad; it doesn't mean I'm not passionate about service, education and empowering youth. But I decided I owed it to myself and to the kids I hoped to inspire to put my money where my mouth was -- to take the time and space I needed to find out what I was capable of as an artist.

So that's what I'm doing now. After a truly crazy/special AmeriYear, I moved out of the city and back into my parents' house to do this thing that I love, record it and eventually release it. When the project is complete, I see myself back in a city again, perhaps working with kids by day and making music by night with an album (that some people kind of like?) to my name. Finding ways to combine my passions won't be easy but I know it's possible and I'm determined to make it work. Until then, I will keep chipping away at these songs in my parents' basement with my kids as my inspiration."

Mr. Inappropriate Part 2

On my way home today, I passed a homeless man.  Our conversation went something like this:

M: Happy Halloween!
J: Happy Halloween to you too!
M: That's a beautiful smile you have.  You can take me home and dress me up for Halloween.  Any way you'd like...

Note to self - no more smiling.  At least not at men.

Mr. Inappropriate

A brief synopsis on why I'm single (among many other reasons):

This weekend I met a man who was dressed as Mr. Inappropriate for Halloween.  No that's not a real costume.  It's just a man dressed to look skeezy with a sticker on his sweater that said "Mr. Inappropriate."  This guy is holding a bottle of wine and a beer can, and mere seconds after him approaching me, his friends split like Jesus was giving out autographs just around the corner.  He tells me he wants to take me out to pancakes.  No, I don't think he was thinking this was his big opportunity to have breakfast for dinner.

Here's some of our dialogue.

J: "Jane. Like Jane Austen."
Mr. I: "Oh I'll remember that."
J: "Big Jane Austen fan?"
Mr. I: "No, but I like wrestling so that's like Steve Austin."

He proceeded to try to tell me how all of this was a costume.  He likes to just hang out at home on the weekends.  No, no, Mr. Inappropriate, I will not call you back.  Thank you for the compliments on my body and smile though.  I was just thinking I should really get some whitening strips, but I guess that doesn't make or break the sexiness of my smile.

Take that idea and run with it

First let me start by saying I'm sorry - I up and left you without even giving you fair warning.  I was out of town for most of last week at a conference learning about youth development, children affected by trauma, and self-care.  It was really interesting, but probably not the best blogging inspiration.  I caught up with friends - none of whom were really facing quarter life crises, but most of whom are facing transitions at work.  Honestly, I think that is my favorite angle of the quarter life crisis because eventually people's love lives aren't as exciting as a blog reader might like them to be.  Let's jump in on that note...

I attended day two of TedxMidAtlantic, and what struck we must is that people found something that interested them and stuck with it.  This was a perfect message shortly after hearing about support systems that children need.  Add my women's studies selection of readings to the mix, and well obviously every strong woman in my life aka every woman in my life, and now I feel like I can't not support the socioemotional and academic growth of girls.  I JUST CAN'T.  And I mean the girl you see walking down the street everyday - not just girls throughout the world.

Now here comes the important stuff - I need to find a map that will lead me to the promised land where all girls are confident in their abilities, supportive of each other, and ready to take on the world and make it a better place!  I haven't spent a lot of time looking for it, but I've already realized that fuckkkk that specific map has not yet been generated just for me and my plans.

So now that I'm a quarter of the way through my life, I can have a mini freakout about my next move, how there isn't enough time, and how I can't let anything get in my way including yesterday's disheartening Idealist search on organizations in Philadelphia with "girl" as a keyword.  Specific steps I have taken to move towards my goal.  So far...dressed up as Rosie the Riveter for Halloween and spotted a number of other Rosie's (this must really be the year of the girl), worn red lipstick because I'm a woman and I can and it was Halloween so I could be serious or not serious about it (clearly still working on that confidence aspect), watched a video of a fearless woman Julia Child...that's pretty much it for now, but the conference was on Saturday, and it's only Monday.  To be continued in future freak outs...